Travel Transition Truth Part 3

Part 3: Truth

"All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them." -Galileo Galilei

This is by far the hardest of the three in this series of blogs to write.  The truth is, being honest and truthful can be really hard.  It's not because I have anything to hide, but more so because my truth is constantly changing.  I am still growing and evolving into the person I have been created to be and each time I think I have myself figured out, I discover something else.   

In the past few weeks since my last blog, I have faced some hard truths.  Some have been tougher pills to swallow than others and I know it is because I often let my pride get in the way.  But, I have also learned that by taking a step back, reflecting, and being really honest with myself, I can gain something postive from each of those situations.

One of my "here's your sign" moments came during a long run and then again the day after.  As I had mentioned in my last blog, I am preparing to run a marathon in 2017.  I have been training for about a month with the expectation that I would run the marathon at the beginning of April. The training plan began around the the first week of November and thought that would give me plenty of time to work up to a marathon distance.  I knew this was going to be a goal that wouldn't be easy and I actually welcomed that.  I like working toward things that seem just out of reach because it makes the want to accomplish it that much more of a need.  What I didn't take into consideration is that although I am not new to running, (I've ran several distances including a half marathon in this year alone) I have not been consistant with it.  So as I began long run days that were becoming two hour runs instead of hour long runs, my brain, my body, and my will just wasn't ready.  After being more sore than I would like to be after days that were supposed to be "easy", I realized I needed to take a step back and reassess.

My initial thoughts were that of defeat.  I was upset that I was letting myself down as well as others.  After all, I had just announced to the world/those that read this blog that I would be running this marathon and now it was beginning to look and feel like I wouldn't.  After some anger, tears, and a pity party, I allowed myself to become much more realistic about the goal I had set for myself.  I had to remind myself that I still had plenty of time to train for a marathon and to run one in this next year.  I just needed to take it slow.  Instead of running a full in April, it was decided that I would run a half instead and from there continue my training till October where I will run the full 26.2 miles.  I find out in about a week if I got picked for the Chicago Marathon Lottery which takes place mid October and at the perfect time in my new training plan.  I have also faced the reality that I may not get picked for the race so I have found another one that I will do instead so that I stay encouraged to continue working toward this goal I have set for myself.

The truth is, running can be hard and running a full marathon can be harder but knowing one's limits and enjoying the journey makes the struggle worth it. 

Another truth about myself that became apparent in the past few weeks is one of my biggest faults.  It is the want and often times the need to be right.  I am not the only person in the world that struggles with this.  I know because often times the people I find myself wanting to be right around are the people that have the same want and need.  Depending on the person and the topic being discussed will determine how persistant I am about getting to an end result where my truth is THE TRUTH.  Often times it is over trivial things, which makes this fault so much worse.  I have a need to be right about things like who used a camp vehicle last and didn't put gas in it, where to find something in the grocery store, or telling someone what time they sent a response text and why it didn't make sense.  This actually happened a couple of days ago and sent me into more of a tizy than it should have.  This fault has become something of a burden for me.  I have found that I have been letting it get in the way of some of my friendships.  I hope and pray that my friends have not felt this burden like I do.  It just isn't worth it.  I care so much more about them than I care about being right and I have found it very life giving to admit to myself and aloud when I am wrong.  It not only humbles me in those relationships, but it gives credit where it is due.

The truth is, the need to be right isn't what is important.  The relationships that you can trust to have those arguments with are.

In my last blog, I jokingly mentioned that I see myself going through some early midlife crisis due to some new thoughts or actions that have crept up on me in the past few months.  I am still wearing a ton of flannel instead of the cardigan that you would have seen me in earlier in the year.  I am still contemplating a nose piercing even though I will most likely never follow through.  And, the desire to get out and see the world continues to grow stronger by the day.  In this time, I have found that I don't need to get things right the first time and I dont need to be right every time.  I will continue to struggle and in that struggle there will be growth.                                                    
                                                                                                               
Because the truth is, life is a blessing--full of discoveries.  And, what we make of it is the best gift we can give ourselves.

Travel Transition Truth Part 2

Part 2: Transition

So the cat is out of the bag.  If any of you have seen this post from a few weeks ago, you will have known that I accidently outed myself about the big challenge that I planned to take on.

I have decided to do a marathon.  Ahhh!  What have I gotten myself into?!  Seriously!

I have hinted at it a few times in the past few postings so it won't come as a surprise for those that read this that I am in a transition time in my life.  Not the transition like changing jobs, finding a new place to live, or seeking out different social outlets, but a transition of feeling and figuring out who I am.  I am in my thirties and I still find myself trying to understand my place in the world.  I've been joking a ton with my closest friends that I think I am going through an early midlife crisis of sorts.

Here are some things I have found myself saying, doing, or considering...

1. Traveling - This isn't much of a shock.  People know I love to travel, but what I have found myself doing is researching out the wazoo about what the next adventure will be.  Besides visiting Europe, other things on the traveling bucket list are visiting all the National Parks, convincing my gal pals to have a long weekend in Marfa, visiting friends at other camps around the country, and the most recent research has been figuring out when, where, and how to see the aurora borealis (Northern Lights) in all their glory.  To prove this sentiment, check out (or don't) my Pinterest page.  It is overwhelming how much I post and share about traveling.

2. Style - Ok. So, my style has changed in the past few months.  I will say that I still consider myself put together, but I have become much more relaxed in what I choose to wear or how I wear it. 

Examples: 

Instead of wearing a scarf or cute shrug of sorts, I have opted for an oversized flannel shirt.  I counted this weekend when I did laundry that I have a total of seven.  SEVEN!  I can't believe I have one for every day of the week.  I don't know anyone else that wears flannel daily except the Brawny Man and I don't have a goal to take his job anytime soon.

I have typically worn simple yet stylish jewelry.  I would say the simple has stayed but I feel how I have worn it has become more eclectic.  There are rings on several fingers, several types of bracelets on at any given time, and I have considered getting a nose piercing.  The fear of the needle is what is currently deterring that decision.

And make-up... There is none unless absolutely needed

Oh. And, Birkenstocks. Yep. Invested in a pair. With no toe loop. You know what that means...socks and sandals in the winter. 😉 Just kidding. But at least it's an option. 

3. Health - I am someone that has always been aware of the need to stay healthy.  However, in the recent months I have found that I LOVE organic foods, working out, and sleeping way more than I ever have before.  The love for organic things I'm sure is all in my head, but ask a few friends from my most recent road trip about the effects of me eating organic things and they will attest to my overall great mood.  My body has a long way to go to show the fruits of this lifestyle change but I have noticed that my overall attitude about life has been much more optimistic as a result of being mindful of these changes.  And this, my friends, is where the idea of a marathon sounded like a good one.

I have inferred that I have found myself happier as a result of some of my health changes and this is true, but this has come from also having found myself in a super low time in my life.  There were lots of little things, nothing worth mentioning, that added up and over time really got me in the pits.  I struggled with finding balance of what I can control and what I can't and it lead me down a path that I knew I needed to try to turn around before going further.

A close friend had mentioned that running a marathon might be a great way to channel some of this energy that I was struggling with.  It would allow me to focus on something that was within my control as well as help me get back on the path of health and fitness.  I was hesitant, but she and I both knew that I'm someone that needs big challenges.  I thrive when I work toward something that seems almost out of reach and when that goal is accomplished, the level of satisfaction and self confidence grows immensely.

So... here I am.  I'm training for my first full marathon that I plan to do in April.  I have also gotten suckered in to signing up for the Chicago Marathon Lottery.  I signed up with three other friends and I know it will be my luck that of the four of us, I will get picked.  I'm in a state of transition, but one that I'm welcoming.  It will be an interesting journey and I can promise that I will have many stories to tell while on this road to something new.

Travel Transition Truth

Part 1: Travel

It's the eve of another jet setting week and I am spending time with a close gal pal who is thankfully giving up some z's to make sure I get to the airport in the morning for my first time journey to the land of the Cornhuskers. 

The past month has been a whirl wind of travel and tomorrow is another day of new adventures.

I don't feel I've had a ton of time to look forward to this trip.  Between work, sleep, and reflecting on my last big adventure, I haven't had the chance to look too far into the future.  Being in the present is something that I have become fully aware of as of late.  I began noticing this mind state while on my adventure west and it became especially apparent in a moment on the trip that I will never forget and have already began to look back on fondly.  Before I divulge I must set the scene...

It's mid October (So, fall.  The best season of the year!) and I had already spent a week on the road with one friend (we'll call him Friend 1) driving to California to pick up another friend (and this one will be Friend 2) from a month long cycling trek from the Canadian boarder to San Francisco.  The three of us have united, spent a few days in the city and head out to spend a solid day in Yosemite National Park.  Flash forward an hour or so since entering the park...

Friend 2: "Let's go on a hike or something.  See the sights..."
Me: "OK!  I'm down!"
Friend 1: "Which hike?"

the three of us looking at a trail map of the park

Friend 2: "This one looks good..."
Me: "OK! I'm down!" (I need a more extensive vocabulary sometimes)
Friend 1: "Y'all have fun.  I'll see y'all when y'all get back."

So the two of us make it to the trail head of the Yosemite Trail to begin what is to be a beautiful sightseeing hike.

The first five minutes of hiking is pleasant.  There's friendly banter between us.  We are waving at hikers as we pass them by and we are looking forward to getting to a particular lookout at the top of this trail.  I'm sweating a bit but that should be expected.  I feel like I'm getting a moderate workout in and at this point the one mile assent seems like an easy enough task.  After all, the trail is considered to be a moderate hike once you get past the beginning.  I keep telling the friend that this is one of the best decisions we've made on the trip.  He seems to agree.  Things are great!

Ten minutes later...

Me: "I HATE YOU!  Why have you done this to me?!"
Friend 2: "What?! What do you mean?  Come on... I bet we only have about 20 more switch backs to do."
Me: "Don't talk to me.  I'm not happy.  This is the WORST decision we have made all trip."
Friend 2: "We can turn around."
Me: "NO! Why would we do that?! We've made it this far.  Just go!"

Around this time it is becoming noticeable that not bringing water might have been a bad idea.  When I saw that the hike was a mile I didn't think much of it.  Actually, I thought, "A mile isn't far, but I don't want to carry any extra weight." 

Big mistake! Turns out not all miles are created equally. Note to self: A mile up is NOT the same as a mile around town.

I'm fine!  I survived thanks to my pal thinking that bringing H2O was a necessity.  We stop for me to take a brief water break when we see a happy couple descending.  A few sips of water in and I'm feeling better about life.  I even say things like, "Ok... so this is actually really great.  This is a fun adventure and I'm glad we are doing this."  My water sharing friend is looking at me a bit skeptically.  So to prove I'm feeling better I turn my attention to the couple coming toward us and in friendly hiker fashion I say, "Not too much further up, huh?" as they are about to pass us.  They stop and ask kindly where we were heading and we told them to the look out.  They look at each other and then back at me and with some hesitation they say that we easily still have another forty-five minutes before getting there and about half of the switch backs still left to go.

Me to Friend: "I HATE YOU!  Why have you done this to me?!  Just go.  I'm right behind you."

I'm so thankful for forgiving friends and tons of patience because about forty-five minutes later (the couple was great at estimating) we made it to one of the most beautiful look-outs.  Some of my favorite pictures of my whole trip were taken in that spot.  Half Dome looks AMAZING at eye level.

There was nothing about that hiking experience that wasn't the epitome of living in the moment.  The challenge, the beauty, and the friendship that got me through that hike was different with every passing minute and every passing switch back, but it made the finish that much more sweet. 

As erratic as my emotions were, it was one of the first times in a really long time that I felt and experienced every moment as it happened.  I was fully aware of each muscle tension, sigh of relief, tear of joy, and smile of those I saw and felt along the way.  My life for a long while has been looking forward and at times so far forward that I have quickly lost sight of the things going on around me that have a huge affect on that future.  Living in the moment is what I needed and is something that I currently need.

I'm in a transition time in my life and through travel, friendships, and this new challenge (which is going well so far), I'm really excited to see what comes of the moments that are taking place NOW.

It's Been Awhile...Trying Something New

I've logged into this blog account for the first time in what has apparently been almost four years. I'm surprised I remember my password. Time is an interesting thing because I can vividly remember my dedication to these entries and penning my last few thoughts. Yet, enough time has gone by that since my last entry I have entered my thirties, seen a ton of the United States (hope to talk about this more in other blogs), we are going into a second presidential election, and I have ran two half marathons along with some smaller races here and there.

Some things have changed and yet many have stayed the same--or visa versa depending on what we are talking about. Life has given me a ton of blessings in the past few years but has also thrown me plenty of curveballs. In the months since the spring there have been epiphanies, affirmations, and struggles that have brought me back to journaling, sitting deep in my thoughts, or sharing a text/dinner/coffee with some of my closest friends and confidantes. And, ultimately, all those things have brought me back here.

In talking to a close friend yesterday, it has been decided that I need a new challenge. I have found that being in my head too much has caused some pain and has had me caught up on things that don't really matter in the grand scheme of things (hate using cliches but this one totally fit).

So...I'm trying something new.

Well...not totally new.

I have accepted the greatest challenge I think I may have ever done for myself. Greater than the year of no soda. Greater than the dedication to blogging. And, even greater/harder than the year of being a vegetarian in Texas. For some, the challenge isn't a challenge at all but a stroll in the park (enter another cliche), but for me, this will require tons of focus, positive self talk, motivation, and good friends along the way.

I'm not quite ready to say what the challenge is, but I have told this same friend that has encouraged me to do this that I would blog about the process--the successes, the failures, and everything in between.  Sorry for the secret. It really isn't one. It's just finding the courage to face the challenge that I have set before myself.

I am entering day two of the goal to work towards and so far, so good.

I invite all that are interested to be part of this journey with me. As time goes by, and with each entry, I'm hoping my confidence grows. And, I have a feeling sooner rather than later, folks will be fully aware of the craziness I have gotten myself into. If I had to predict...it will come out in the first moments of hardship and frustration, which could be on another cliche called the horizon.

Stay tuned.